Forgettory and Neurodiversity

Forgettory and neurodiversity

Imagine a bookshelf that only holds three books, but you have nine books that you need to put on the shelf. Every time you add another book over the first three, the others fall off. You now need to catch the book that has fallen and try and place it back on the shelf – as you do the next book falls. This cycle continues throughout the day! Welcome to forgettory and neurodiversity

For many neurodivergent individuals, this is the reality of how their short-term memory works.

What this looks like in my life. As I wake up in the morning with a bunch of ideas floating around in my head, as soon as I interact with a member of my family those ideas are gone and replaced with the conversations and requirements of the day. This cycle then continues as I move to the next part of the day, be it breakfast, exercise, or work. What seems to happen is a continuous fight to hold on to great ideas and actions. This can be incredibly debilitating as the energy required trying to hold onto the ideas or books that have fallen from the shelf is immense. What is more frustrating is that when you put something back on the shelf you are likely to have pushed something else off and the cycle goes on again.

This doesn’t stop here, we need our short-term memory for our working memory to function effectively. The more restricted our short-term memory is, the more difficult it is to use our working memory effectively to solve problems, hold ideas and work with complicated or sometimes not-so-complicated issues.

Both areas of memory are under the concept of executive function (EF). Executive function is a cluster of skills that are necessary for efficient and effective future behaviours. These skills are the ones that sit outside of what we do automatically.

For example, you may have done the following without even thinking about it:

  • Got out of bed
  • Made a cup of tea
  • Checked your phone
  • Made your porridge
  • Unloaded the dishwasher (not for all of us I know).

Executive function (EF) comes into its own when we attempt to do new things in different situations. These situations don’t always need to be critically complicated, just different from what we expect to do on autopilot and can include things like:

  • Changing the number of people you are making porridge for
  • Meeting someone new for the first time
  • Someone giving you a slot car racing toy (Scalextrics) for your children (that’s in pieces with no instructions).

These are my experiences, it is important to note that there is a ground of evidence showing EF is relevant to a number of neurodivergent conditions including ADHD, ASD/C, developmental coordination disorder DCD (also known as dyspraxia), dyslexia, and dyscalculia.

How these impact you

Getting started:

  • The actual process of starting can be really challenging when you’re not sure you have got everything you need in your memory.
  • Reflecting on what you need can sometimes make it even harder to get moving.
  • Understanding how long something can take has a significant impact as it can feel like an unknown.

Not being kind to yourself:

  • Thinking you are good enough.
  • Focusing on the negatives.
  • Not recognising the things you do well.

Running out of road:

  • Knowing that there are things you have forgotten.
  • Not having enough time to process.
  • Feeling you have to make decisions even though you’re not ready to.
  • Trying to be like everyone else.

Staying in the zone:

  • Staying on task.
  • Moving from one task to another.
  • Finding it hard to get your head around things.

What might happen next:

  • Sometimes when you run out of road (in terms of processing and EF) it’s hard to think about what might happen next based on previous experience.
  • It’s also very challenging to predict what difficulties or challenges you might face in the future.

Being all out all of the time:

  • Perception of time can often be linked.
  • This makes it difficult to remember appointments.
  • Putting the right amount of time aside to complete tasks.
  • Break things down into smaller tasks and understanding what the time indications are.

What can be done?

The executive function often forms the glue that allows us to deploy our skills effectively. I’ve talked before about the fact we need to help neurodivergent individuals amplify their strengths and manage the things that they find difficult. Unfortunately, if they are not able to use their strengths because their executive function doesn’t allow them to be present, they will be unable to thrive. What is often needed is skills and frameworks to help the individual unleash their potential, these could look like:

Checking in on how well things are going.

  • What does the day look like?
  • Have you got enough time to do the things you have set before you?
  • Who do you feel you need to ask about what to do next?
  • Do you need space to put things in perspective?
  • Who are you going to be accountable to?
  • What are you going to do when things go wrong?
  • What is your Banana?

Definition of banana – it is the thing you have in your back pocket. It gives you time and space to reset yourself. My Banana is often around taking a short break to do something completely different, for example skipping.

Lists and processes

Creating a list of activities is a really helpful way to understand what needs to be done.

Don’t treat these like a stick!

Treat them as a way to formulate your plan for the day.

Processes are also useful as once you have done something once:

  • Record it
  • Review it
  • Revisit it – make it better next time!

Once it is written down, you have something to compare it against, removing the need to rethink how you are going to do something again. It is also a great tool to go to when you have run out of road as you have already done your thinking.

Reflect on what is happening, take stock and make sure you ask someone else to check in on your belief of what’s going on. It is worth pre-emptively asking someone to help so when you need support, they already know how to serve you best.

Remove the tat and rubbish to make space for this thinking.

This could be about coming away from your current work environment, tidying up, or turning off your email. What is important is you are not distracted when you are working on your processes.

Think about the team you work with, who loves doing certain tasks? What tasks do you love doing? How can you collaborate to get the most out of both of you and the people you work with? What tasks should be automated or relegated?

Navigating this space is tricky, especially on your own. If this article rings true, I would encourage you to reflect on it with someone you trust at work or reach out to a workplace coach who can help you move through this space.

If you would like to have a conversation with me about this topic for yourself or someone you lead please get in contact.

Book shelf idea credit: Janette Beetham

Person Reading - The Medici effect book review

The Medici effect book review

The name ‘The Medici effect’ is taken from the ‘The House of Medici’ an Italian banking and political family that funded and supported innovations in art, finance, and music. These innovations included ideas ranging from double-entry bookkeeping, Opera to the piano.

What jumped out to me was:

This is an important book that explores why we need to look at the intersections between different siloed disciplines to see breakthroughs. The book goes on to help us explore how looking at the same problem from various places gives new insight and discovery.

I also really enjoyed the way the author brought to light why diversity is essential in this process, as diverse thinkers bring not only themselves to the problem but also their network of contacts and relationships.

There is also some wonderful thinking about the quantity and quality of ideas. My key takeaway is that it’s important to have a good quantity of ideas so you can pick the quality ones. This type of thinking has been used by many successful characters including Alexander Graham Bell and Richard Branson.

Operating at the intersection as the author describes it is a fantastic place though slightly scary at times. What it gives you is the opportunity to create innovative ideas and new spaces with the threshold for success often lower because no one else is operating there.

Think about it, if you want to become the very best in your field you have to compete with everyone who has gone before you and everyone who is trying to do it now. If you want to achieve something at the intersection you may be the only person or team in that field so your bar to success is far lower.

I believe neurodivergent individuals naturally gravitate towards the intersection of different fields and ideas.

Why read this book?

It’s insightful, engaging, has been a bestseller for a number of years and has been included in many academic programs. If you take on board what is written it will change your attitude to innovation and potentially increase your opportunity for success.

This is my take on The Medici Effect. It would be great to hear your thoughts.

System blindness

Why systems blindness impacts neurodiversity

Sam is a middle-aged neurodivergent individual in a small boutique design and consultancy firm with a global reach. Sam is an experienced business development professional with a strong track record. When he started working for this firm, he was effectively employee number three. He joined the two founding partners who had worked together for over 20 years. Sam could not work out why he was unable to perform. He was doing the tasks he thought he was expected to do based on his earlier work experience. Is Sam experiencing systems blindness?

Clear Is Kind. Unclear Is Unkind. Brené Brown

We are often blind to the way systems shape the way we think about ourselves and the environments that we inhabit.

Systems blindness often causes stress, anxiety and lost opportunities to engage and enable individuals to be their most effective at work.

Systems influence the way we perceive the world and the way we perceive others. This can often result in distorted views about relationships with other people because of the way we are bound up in the systems we work in. If we were able to step outside of the systems that we inhabit, step outside our workplaces and the relationships we have within them, it would be very different.

In the workplace we are often in several types of systemic relationships, these include vertical top to bottom, horizontal end to middle to end and internal external supplier to customer relationships. These relationships exist because of the tasks and roles that we carry out. Unfortunately, we are often blind to these relationships and their implications as many of us do not see the world like that. We instead see only from our narrow point of view.

Where we are sitting right now?

These systematic relationships often influence where power sits within our organisations. For example, in the top to bottom relationship, power often moves to the top disenfranchising the bottom.

System blindness can go to a whole new level. If you are unaware of the system and the social rules, this can affect neurodivergent individual as they may have low awareness of these systems and how they work.

In Sam’s case what became clear was that Sam’s expectations were very different from his employers in terms of what he should be doing and how he should be doing it.

This came down to expectations and unwritten rules. The systems that this organisation had been using were perfect for the two founders, but for someone new they were unclear and difficult to negotiate.

Navigating systems blindness

Working with Sam gave him the opportunity to help understand what was important to his employer and how he could shine by delivering the basics first and then adding value later. This started with painting a picture of what the systems within Sam’s organisation looked like. This included positioning where the power sat and what power he had in terms of managing his own workload and responsibilities. There was also an opportunity to explore the unwritten rules of the organisation and how he could engage with them to help him be his most effective at work.

Being clear about the rules and our systems is kind, being unclear is unkind!

If you would like to explore how systems affect your organisation and how to navigate them, please get in contact.