Pigeons, neurodiversity and flawsomeness

One Sunday morning, I woke up with a sore head after an eventful night at my friend Nick’s wedding.

Later that day, I went to a church in north London and met up with my friend Simon. He told me that our mutual friend Emma was having a pigeon problem. The issue was that the pigeons were walking around in her loft, causing her sleepless nights for the past 10 nights. She was utterly exhausted and had no energy to deal with the problem.

Simon asked me if I could help Emma with her pigeon problem, and I agreed. We crawled into a small loft space and spent almost four hours carefully bringing down the birds. However, during the process, Simon’s trousers got covered in pigeon poo and ruined, and I started to feel quite unwell. Despite our efforts, we failed to realise that the pigeons kept flying back through the hole in the roof they had been using all along. Our plan was flawed, and we were feeling disheartened. I had a sore head, and we were both covered in poo and feathers.

Often, we tend to focus on our flaws rather than our strengths. People with neurodivergent traits, in particular, may be very aware of their difficulties and less aware of their strengths. However, the issues we consider flaws can sometimes be our greatest strengths. For example, if I say yes on an impulse due to my ADHD traits, but it helps someone in need, I would consider this is a strength. The challenge is to recognise them and leverage them to move from a state of less than to more than. Perhaps this means finding ways to get pigeons out of lofts or saying yes to helping someone else out in need on an impulse.

How to Embrace Your Flawsomeness

“Flawsome” is a word coined by Tyra Banks and describes something that is awesome because of….not despite of its flaws.

The concept thrives on the idea that it’s perfectly possible for flaws and awesomeness to coexist and amplifies this idea that your imperfections are perfect.

Embracing your flawsomeness is not difficult, but it does require a shift in perspective.

Here are some steps to help you become flawsome:

Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is a crucial first step in developing your “flawsome” self. Recognising your perceived flaws is how you can build your unique strengths and traits. By acknowledging your areas of difficulty, you can work on them and turn them into strengths. The key is approaching yourself with kindness and compassion, recognising that everyone has flaws and imperfections.

Self-acceptance

Self-acceptance is another critical step in developing a “flawsome” self. It’s essential to acknowledge and accept yourself as you are right now, recognising that everyone has strengths and areas of difficulty. Although it’s natural to want to improve, it’s equally important to appreciate and embrace your present self. For instance, if you struggle with managing your energy levels, acknowledging this is the first step towards finding a solution.

Vulnerability

Vulnerability is not a weakness; it’s an opportunity to see yourself as you are and determine what to do next. Being vulnerable means acknowledging your flaws and being willing to show your true self to others. It’s not always easy, but it can lead to greater self-awareness and personal growth. By embracing vulnerability and recognising your strengths and weaknesses, you can work towards becoming your best self.

Self-improvement

Self-improvement is an essential element of the “flawsome” journey. Life is a continuous learning process, and there are always opportunities for growth and development. Experimenting with the tools available to enhance your strengths and manage your challenges effectively can help you achieve your goals and become the best version of yourself. Whether it’s learning a new skill, practicing mindfulness, or seeking professional help, many resources are available to help you on your journey of self-improvement.

Unlocking Your Flawsomeness and Embracing Neurodiversity

Embracing your “flawsomeness” is a transformative journey that can lead you from a place of shame and unhappiness to a state of contentment. By recognising what makes you unique and acknowledging areas that might be more challenging, you can move forward and become the best version of yourself. If you’re unsure about where to start on your journey to embrace your “flawsomeness” and explore your neurodiversity, the first step is often having a conversation with someone who knows you well. They can provide valuable insights into what they see in you, even in the aspects you perceive as flaws.

By opening up and having honest conversations with those around you, you can better understand yourself and your strengths and weaknesses. Consider seeking professional help, joining support groups, or engaging in self-reflection exercises to help you. Remember, embracing your “flawsomeness” is unique to you, and it’s essential to approach it with kindness, compassion, and an open mind. With time and effort, you can transform your life and become the best version of yourself.

At The Neurodivergent Coach, we understand the power of embracing your “flawsomeness” and unlocking your potential. We aim to create an inclusive environment that nurtures personal growth and celebrates your unique qualities.

If you believe a conversation about this could be useful, we invite you to contact us.

We believe in helping individuals embrace their neurodiversity and achieve their goals. So, join us in the journey of embracing your “flawsomeness” and unlocking your potential.