Tag Archive for: Coaching

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To be unclear is to be unkind: neurodiversity and the trust trap

“To be clear is to be kind. To be unclear is to be unkind.” Brene Brown.

Not long ago, someone I worked with was struggling in their role. They were not hitting targets. Their team was frustrated. Their manager did not know what to do. On paper, it appeared to be a poor performance.

But what was really going on?

The expectations had not been made clear. The communication was patchy. The rules of engagement were never agreed upon, and in that silence the individual began to spiral. They grew anxious. They began to feel scrutinised. At one point, they wondered aloud whether spyware had been installed on their device to track their every move. It had not. Their manager was not surveilling them. But the damage was done.

A seed of doubt had been planted. And it did not grow in a vacuum: it grew in the rich soil of silence.

To be unclear is to be unkind: miscommunication is costly

Misunderstandings like this do not just cost time: they erode trust. They create stories where none exist. They lead people to feel unseen, unheard, and unsafe.

And it is not just an interpersonal issue. A recent poll found that employees spend around 7.5 hours per week dealing with miscommunication, nearly 20% of their working week, and that the majority of workers say unclear communication directly wastes their time.

Now imagine this playing out in a neurodivergent workplace.

To be unclear is to be unkind: why ambiguity is a stress state for neurodivergent employees

For many neurodivergent people, whether autistic, ADHD, dyslexic, or otherwise, ambiguity does not feel like flexibility. It feels like a risk.

No clarity on how to ask for help? It may not feel safe to try. No defined expectations on output? Someone might keep tweaking endlessly or freeze entirely. No shared rules of engagement? They may assume they are doing everything wrong and start bracing for the fallout.

It is easy to label this as oversensitivity or paranoia. But these are often people who have experienced unclear communication as a consistent barrier, sometimes a threat to their credibility or psychological safety. That context matters.

The danger of assumptions

When there is a communication gap, people do not simply sit in the unknown. They fill that gap. And rarely generously.

In the story above, the employee assumed they were being monitored. Why? Because no one had said otherwise. There was no transparency about how performance was being assessed. Silence left room for doubt.

From the manager’s side, they assumed the employee understood what was expected. They thought they would speak up if something was wrong. Two people, two different stories, neither with bad intentions. But assumption, silence, and vagueness created a trust gap that neither side knew how to close.

5 communication practices for managers working with neurodivergent teams

1. Paint done: show what good looks like

Do not just say “make sure this is finished by Friday.” Spell out what done means: what the final deliverable looks like, where it should be stored, who needs to review it, and what should happen if things go off track. This removes guesswork and saves hours of rework and anxiety.

2. Set and revisit rules of engagement

Especially in hybrid or remote teams, clarify which tools are used for what, the expected response time, how people should flag when they are overwhelmed or stuck, and what a successful check-in looks like. This is not rigidity: it is shared scaffolding. For neurodivergent employees, that scaffolding can make or break performance.

3. Make the trust conversation explicit

Rather than assuming trust is implied, say it directly: “I do not monitor every move. I look at results, communication, and outcomes. If something is unclear, I want us to be able to talk about it early, not after the fact.” Creating a shared expectation that talking about the process is part of the process changes everything.

4. Use curiosity rather than assumption

Instead of “Why did you not do this?”, try “Help me understand how you approached this” or “What was your understanding of the ask?” These questions keep the conversation open and uncover the real root of the problem without putting people on the defensive.

5. Name and challenge your own assumptions

Assumptions are easy to miss. You assume someone is disengaged because they are quiet. You assume they understood the deadline. You assume they prefer async communication. Start naming these internally before taking action. When you model that kind of thinking, your team learns to do the same.

Trust is not just built: it is repaired, revisited, and re-clarified

No team gets this right all the time. Miscommunications will happen. But the difference lies in what happens next.

When you lead from the belief that misunderstandings are not failures but invitations, you create environments where neurodivergent employees can focus on their strengths rather than burning energy decoding vague signals.

Clarity is not control. Clarity is care.

Ready to build more neuroinclusive communication in your organisation?

If this resonates and you would like practical support in building clearer, kinder communication across your teams, our talks and workshops give managers and HR leaders the tools to make this shift in practice.

For one-to-one support, our coaching offer helps both managers and neurodivergent employees build strategies that work. And if a more structured assessment of an individual’s workplace needs would be a useful starting point, our Workplace Needs Assessment packages provide a clear, evidence-based route forward.

You are welcome to get in touch to discuss a specific situation, or sign up for our newsletter for monthly insights on supporting neurodivergent employees at work.

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Coaching for Neurodivergent Employees: What HR Leaders Should Consider

When it comes to coaching neurodivergent people, the single most important thing you can bring is not a qualification in neurodiversity. It is great coaching. That conviction was at the heart of a session I recently ran for a group of internal coaches at the Methodist Church, and it is something I come back to again and again in my work.

This post captures the key ideas from that conversation. Whether you are a professional coach, a manager who coaches informally, or a pastoral worker supporting others, these principles apply.

TL;DR: You do not need to be a neurodiversity expert to coach neurodivergent people well. You need to create safety, contract clearly, stay curious, and be willing to adapt. Five things to take away: trust the process, trust yourself, trust the other person, notice what is going on, and always ask.

Great coaching is the foundation

Be a great coach first: Brené Brown says clear is kind and unclear is unkind. This applies directly to coaching neurodivergent people. If we are not clear about what we are doing, what stays the same and what adapts, we risk being unkind without meaning to. The same applies when we carry too many models into a coaching relationship. Clarity gets crowded out.

What you can control: As a coach, you can only control two things: the time you give and how you turn up. The most valuable preparation for any coaching session is working on yourself. Make sure you are in the best possible space to be fully present.

Attentive but not bothered: Be fully attentive to what is happening in the session. But do not be attached to the outcome. Your role is to hold the space, not to fix the person. The moment we become invested in a particular result, we stop being truly present.

Contracting is not optional when coaching neurodivergent people

ABC: Always Be Contracting. Contracting is not something that happens once at the start of a coaching relationship. It is an ongoing conversation throughout every session.

Confidentiality: Everything remains confidential unless something arises that puts the individual, another person, or a third party at risk. This covers both safeguarding and mental health. If something comes up, you need to know in advance what you will do about it. Having that conversation early is an act of care.

Permission to adapt: Part of contracting with a neurodivergent client is creating explicit permission to flex how you work together. Ask what helps. Ask what gets in the way. Do not assume. That permission, once granted, can yield significant insight.

Understanding neurodivergent conditions

Neurodiversity is for everyone: The term recognises that all human brains are different. Within that, there is a subset of people we might describe as neurodivergent: individuals whose brains work differently from the statistical norm and who may carry a related diagnosis.

No diagnosis required: Under the Equality Act, an individual does not need a formal diagnosis to be entitled to reasonable adjustments. Showing that they experience a substantial difficulty likely to last at least 12 months is sufficient. As coaches, being aware of this matters.

Notice, do not diagnose: Your role is not to identify what condition someone might have. It is worth noticing what is showing up in the room and staying curious about it. This is one of the most liberating principles a coach can hold when working in this space.

Disability can appear in three forms: permanent, temporary, and situational. A neurodivergent person might be entirely fine in one setting and genuinely struggling in another. Holding space gently enough for someone to work that out can create significant insight.

Language and psychological safety

Ask, do not assume: There is enormous variation in how people use language in this space. The same word can mean different things to different people. The most important thing is to ask what someone means and how that relates to how you will work together.

A question that can unlock a great deal is simply this: what does this mean for how we might work together? Whether the word is a diagnosis, a descriptor, or just how someone refers to themselves, asking that question keeps you in genuine partnership.

Psychological safety: Timothy Clark’s work identifies four stages of psychological safety. We often assume that the people we work with have challenger safety: the ability to self-advocate and speak up. This is not always true. In a coaching context, someone may not feel safe enough to ask for what they need. Without that foundation, high support is not possible.

Lens, not label: All of this is only ever part of who someone is. The most useful thing we can do as coaches is to see neurodivergent conditions as a lens through which to view, rather than a label to be worn.

Five things to take away

Trust the process: Good coaching works. Trust it.

Trust yourself: Your skills and instincts matter more than specialist knowledge.

Trust the other person: They know themselves better than you do. Your role is to help them access that knowledge.

Notice what is going on: Masking, executive function difficulties, rejection sensitivity, and fear can all surface in a coaching session. Stay curious.

Always ask: Ask in a way where you genuinely do not know what the answer will be. That is the only way to stay in true partnership with the person you are working with.

And remember: conversations matter. Where you have them matters. Changing the context can unlock entirely different thinking.

Want to go deeper?

If you work with neurodivergent people and want to explore this further, I offer coaching, talks and workshops, and consultancy for organisations that want to be genuinely inclusive, not just compliant. Get in touch here.

Defending boundaries: when RSD turns up

A close look at one of the most misunderstood drivers of avoidance and withdrawal that coaches encounter in neurodivergent clients.

Capacity and neurodiversity

What capacity really means for neurodivergent people, and why it matters in any coaching or support relationship.

No masks needed in the forest

Why masking is one of the most important things to understand when coaching neurodivergent people, and what it costs.

Stay connected

If this post was useful, there is plenty more where it came from. Every month we share practical insights on neurodiversity, management, and making workplaces work better for everyone. Sign up to the newsletter here.

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Neuro-inclusive meetings: Thoughtful practice for managers

Neuro-inclusive meetings are not about getting everything right or introducing complex systems. They are about paying attention to how meetings feel, how they are experienced, and what they ask of the people in the room.

Many managers already do a lot of this instinctively. They test things out, notice what works, ask for feedback, and adapt. Often, they just have not named it as neuro-inclusive practice.

This blog is designed to help you make those choices more intentionally, particularly when supporting autistic people and others with overlapping neurodivergent traits. It is practical, reflective, and grounded in the reality of day-to-day management.

Why neuro-inclusive meetings matter

Neuro-inclusive meetings support autistic traits such as a preference for predictability, clarity, and time to process. They also support people with ADHD, anxiety, sensory sensitivities, trauma histories, and fluctuating energy levels.

Co-occurrence is common. Most people are not navigating just one thing.

When meetings feel unclear, rushed, or unstructured, people can disengage or become overwhelmed. That is rarely about motivation or commitment. More often, it is about the meeting environment, asking more than someone can comfortably give at that moment.

Inclusive meetings are not about lowering expectations. They are about creating conditions where people can genuinely contribute.

How neuro-inclusive meetings handle advance notice

Knowing when something will happen matters.

For autistic people, advance notice can be essential for mental and emotional preparation. For others, it may help with managing energy, sensory load, caring responsibilities, or simply switching tasks.

When meetings are scheduled with little notice, people often arrive already stressed.

Helpful approaches include:

  • Giving as much notice as possible
  • Being clear about start and end times
  • Using last-minute meetings only when truly necessary

Reflective question: How easy is it for someone to prepare themselves for this meeting?

When expectations are unclear

Many people find meetings easier when they know why they are there and what is being asked of them.

This is especially true for autistic people, who often value explicit role clarity. It can also help anyone who worries about speaking up, interrupting, or misunderstanding unspoken rules.

Helpful approaches include:

  • Stating the purpose of the meeting in simple language
  • Clarifying whether people are there to listen, contribute, decide, or learn
  • Being explicit about whether any preparation is needed

Small moments of clarity can make a big difference.

Unstructured social time and ice breakers

Informal chat and icebreakers can help some people settle. For others, they can feel exposed, confused, or unexpectedly demanding.

This is particularly true when activities involve personal disclosure, being put on the spot, or not knowing what is coming.

Example from an education setting: A training session begins with a personal-sharing exercise that is not signposted. Some people engage easily. Others feel caught off guard and unsure how much to say.

Supportive approaches include:

  • Explaining activities in advance
  • Making participation optional
  • Offering structured alternatives, such as writing things down or working in pairs
  • Saying out loud that opting out is completely acceptable

Feeling safe often comes from having choice.

Breaks and permission to step away

Meetings can be demanding on attention, sensory processing, and emotional regulation.

Autistic people may need time away from noise or visual input. Others may need movement, quiet, medication breaks, or simply space to reset.

Supportive approaches include:

  • Building in regular breaks
  • Naming them clearly
  • Letting people know they can step out if needed

Reflective question: Would someone feel comfortable leaving this meeting if they needed to?

Ending neuro-inclusive meetings with clarity

Unclear endings can leave people feeling unsettled. When actions are vague or decisions are implied rather than stated, it can create unnecessary anxiety.

Helpful approaches include:

  • Summarising what has been agreed
  • Clearly naming actions, owners, and timelines
  • Treating the meeting as a complete piece of work

Clear endings allow people to move on without carrying the meeting with them.

Different meetings, different needs

Neuro-inclusive meetings look different depending on context.

In technology settings, fast-paced idea-sharing can overwhelm processing capacity. Agendas, turn-taking, and written summaries can help.

In sports or network-style meetings, informal connections are often central. Adding light structure, clear objectives, or a buddy system can make these spaces more accessible.

In one-to-one meetings, talking is not always the easiest way to think. Some people engage better with shared notes, walking meetings, or time to reflect before responding.

There is no single right way. Flexibility matters.

If you are also supporting a team member through a formal workplace needs assessment, our Workplace Needs Assessment packages provide structured support alongside everyday inclusive practice.

Environment and timing

Meetings are shaped by more than agendas.

Noise, lighting, visual clutter, and movement can all affect how easy it is to engage. Time of day matters too. Many people have periods when their focus is stronger, and scheduling meetings during those windows can make them far more productive.

Reflective question: Have you ever asked your team what times and environments work best for meetings?

Contracting the meeting

Clear social contracts can reduce uncertainty.

It can be helpful to say explicitly:

  • What can be shared
  • That respectful challenge is welcome
  • What sits within the scope of the meeting

This removes the need for people to guess what is acceptable.

This is about learning, not perfection

Neuro-inclusive meetings are not about getting everything right the first time.

They are about noticing, asking, adjusting, and being open to feedback. Often, the most inclusive managers are the ones who stay curious and responsive.

If you would like broader guidance on inclusive workplace practice, Acas offers useful context for UK managers.

Want to continue the conversation?

Setting a healthy meeting culture can feel complex. Having an open, reflective conversation often makes the biggest difference.

If you would like to talk about training, facilitation, or what might support your organisation, take a look at our talks and workshops or our coaching offer. You are also welcome to get in touch directly.

You can also sign up to our newsletter for monthly insights on neuro-inclusive practice.

Good meetings are not about control. They are about care, clarity, and creating space for people to do their best work.

A red fast jet flying through the sky

Top Gun (1986) and parallels with neurodiversity coaching

If you grew up in the 80s, you may love or hate Top Gun which stars Tom Cruise, Kelly McGillis, Meg Ryan and others. It’s a film I love and have written about before and has defined much of my thinking. There are lessons that have carried me through a lot of my experience around coaching and neurodiversity. Here’s little nuggets of wisdom that I have picked up from the film that parallel with neurodiversity coaching.

It seems coaching and the film are wildly different but hang in there, this could be the wildest ride of your life…I feel the need, the need for speed! (That’s entirely from the film, in case you missed it).

Let’s start

Tom Cruise’s character, Maverick. He shows a lot of promise yet lets himself down in many ways. He’s frustrated with himself and the system, but when he tries his best, he significantly improves. This is much like many neurodivergent thinkers and leaders I work with. They often struggle with the system and need to work out ways to interact to shape their processes so they can perform at their best. This is how I can help, by amplifying strengths and managing the things an individual may find tricky.

Difficulty

In the film, the characters join in a training exercise, competing to take down the practice enemy and earn personal points. Maverick, played by Tom Cruise, is piloting a plane with Goose who is the Radar Intercept Officer seated behind him. During the flight, they fly through the other planes’ jet wash (turbulent air created behind a jet aircraft due to the high-speed exhaust gases expelled from its engines). This results in both engines failing, sending the plane into an uncontrollable flat spin. Maverick and Goose are forced to eject from the aircraft with no other options. Tragically, Goose has a fatal injury during ejection, lands in the sea with Maverick and dies a short time later.

This forces Maverick to go to a place he is uncomfortable with as he blames himself for a mistake that wasn’t his fault. Ultimately, that ejection system should have been able to deal with those conditions.

This kind of self-blaming can show up in neurodiversity, for example, in ADHD or Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD). This is where individuals fear rejection and blame themselves for the things that happen that have nothing to do with them. This can lead to crippling feelings of anxiety and low self-worth, meaning they are not able to perform at their best.

Tricky Mission

Maverick’s (Tom Cruise) journey involves him being selected to perform a tricky mission at the end of the film where he flies through another jet wash, but this time it doesn’t take his engines out. As you can imagine, this brings back the trauma of his friend’s death. He temporarily disengages and switches off from flying his plane, which puts one of his colleagues, Iceman in grave danger. Maverick overcomes this by the conversations that are happening over the plane’s comms system and also by his self-talk. This overlaps with coaching because coaching around neurodiversity is often about building resilience and creating coping mechanisms that support you in your workplace. This allows the individual to move forward effectively.

One of the other themes in the film is the idea of mentorship, which Maverick has from the Top Gun program from his mentors Viper and Jester. They guide him through how to take his raw, energetic and unorthodox approach and turn it into something valuable to the organisation. This draws many parallels with neurodivergent thinkers in terms of how they feel about workplace problems and the solutions they want to implement. Being able to deliver solutions in a palatable way that meets the organisation’s needs is vital for any changes to have the desired effect. I’ve worked with individuals who have great ideas, but don’t deliver them in a way that is appetising enough for the organisation and it brings the question, do you need a Top Gun mentorship programme in your organisation to help mould some of your mavericks?

Failure and Top Gun

The change and growth in Maverick’s story is an integral part of the film. Towards the end of the film, he has moved from someone who has failed in his responsibility towards Goose, his Radar Intercept Officer, to being confident in his own abilities to deliver what he needs to do to support himself and his team to be effective. He’s even able to overcome his lack of self-confidence as he reflects on what has gone wrong.

This narrative is just as relevant to neurodivergent thinkers, particularly in the workplace. Building confidence and reframing the conversations is vital. I worked with someone recently who felt they could not market themselves effectively yet were successful with a full calendar of client work. Their social media game was poor and they felt they were, “less than” because they could’nt advertise themselves effectively. We reframed it to, “I’m so good at what I do that I don’t need to advertise”. Having that reframe was vital for them to see their brilliance.

Collaboration and Top Gun

Collaboration and teamwork are needed in the film. The film emphasises the need for the pilots to work together in pairs, protecting and watching over each other as they enter challenging situations, particularly when faced with the enemy. I’ve noticed in a lot of my work around neurodiversity in the workplace, the team is often the best vehicle for neurodivergent individuals to move forward. It allows them to progress in what they are doing while working with others who are great at different things and can complement their skills. This is only possible through learning how to collaborate well. I’d like to add that agreement is not the same as collaboration, meaning you don’t have to agree on everything. You must decide on the essential things to move forward.

Flexibility and Top Gun

The film Top Gun touches on this concept of adaptability and flexibility. The pilots in Top Gun, particularly Maverick’s character, must adjust to changing situations. This is true regarding how he treats Charlie, the female lead character, as he recognises, she is an incredibly skilled instructor instead of just someone he fancies in the bar that they drink in. He also must adapt his techniques and ways of approaching what he does based on what’s happening in front of him. This is a challenge for neurodivergent thinkers in the workplace because life is not always the way we see it.  There is complexity and nuance that we often don’t pick up on, so we have to find ways to adapt and learn how to be our most effective.

Coaching and mentoring played an essential part in developing Maverick into the successful fighter pilot he became. It can change people’s lives, and often, it’s about creating a space where individuals can learn to be their best so they can move forward. Coaching is often implemented for people who are struggling but can play a vital role in developing who they become.

If you haven’t watched Top Gun 1986 watch it, and it’s so good they’ve made a second film which is a continuation from the first film. The storyline is even less believable but will have you feeling the thrill of flying and the need for speed!

A blog about services

For employers

Workplace Needs Assessment

This is for individuals who are having difficulties with everyday tasks in the workplace and aims to make recommendations to help improve the effectiveness of the individual.

Neurodiversity Awareness Training

An introduction to neurodiversity that will help people understand the various neurodivergent conditions such as dyslexia, dyscalculia, autism, dyscalculia and ADHD.

Leadership Coaching

This supports leaders in their thinking journey and is especially useful when considering neurodiversity within the workplace. This coaching can be focused on supporting leaders from neurominority groups.

For individuals

One-to-one Coaching

This service helps neurodivergent individuals deal with everyday life more effectively. It is designed to build on existing skills, and introduce new ones focused on improving workplace effectiveness.

Technology Mentoring

Assistive technology mentoring is about helping you understand how technology can solve your workplace difficulties. What’s important is finding solutions that work for you in your workplace.

Workplace Needs Assessment

This is for individuals who are having difficulties with everyday tasks in the workplace and aims to make recommendations to help improve the effectiveness of the individual.

Accredited courses

Dyslexia Champions™

This program equips individuals to be good listeners, approachable, knowledgeable and impartial and will help them become ‘qualified to guide’ colleagues to support neurodivergent conditions.

Neuroinclusive Practice™

This program is designed to equip leaders, line managers, supervisors and HR personnel to ‘spot the signs’ and be able to effectively manage and support neurodiverse staff in the workplace.

Bucket full to capacity

What is capacity, and why is it important?

Capacity can be a scary word and one that employers, supervisors and managers can find concerning. It can be helpful to think about this area through the frame of “assume individuals are together enough to deal with their own stuff until they’re not” (Credit Claire Pendrick).

That means dealing with the individual where they are right now and asking them what you need to do to make the space safe enough for them to do their work. Experience shows that asking that question helps most individuals feel safe enough to move forward. The fact that the question has been asked is all that’s needed to make it safe enough. If there is no response or the individual completely avoids the question, this can sometimes indicate that they are not in a position to have the conversation.

Capacity can be complicated, especially when we start talking about the medical definitions of someone having the capacity to make a decision. In a coaching conversation, two people are having a conversation about one person where that person is getting insights into their stuff so they can make leaps forward or understand things better.

Sometimes the coach plays a role in capacity. What I mean by this is, have they created a safe enough space for this person to do the work they need to do? If they haven’t, they may have reduced the thinker’s capacity, and as a result, the thinker can’t do the work. This reflects on the space the coach has created, which may mean they’re just not the right coach for the thinker; often, there is no way to know this. 

So an excellent way to keep the space safe is to have a single coaching session so the thinker and the coach can work this out. Then the thinker can decide if the coaching is working for them.

If you’re trying to work out what to do and are concerned about capacity, it’s well worth considering a coaching single-session to find out what would be worth doing next. 

What to know more? Please get in touch.

Clock ticking - what is effective coaching

What is effective coaching?

“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us” J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

Jump or stands still, commit or walk away, move forwards, or move backwards. These are the choices that we face everyday. They could be about work, our personal life or just how we do life.

How often do we not take time to decide what we want to do? And instead, let life happen to us.

The problem is if we do not make choices about what we want to do and where we want to spend our time, we are not likely to end up in the place we want to be. Effective coaching offers a valuable opportunity to reflect on where we are and the choices we have in front of us.

Taking time

If we do not take this time, the implication is that we miss opportunities and don’t get to be our best selves. This can often mean being overlooked for the jobs we would love to do or just not getting the most out of the things that we enjoy.

Effective coaching

Offers a place where you can think and work out what you would like to do next. It is a place that offers high support and high challenge where one person is thinking and the other is noticing what is going on in order to help you understand and gain insight into your own stuff. Coaching has changed my life, giving me insight into the things that really matter and helping me make choices about where I spend my time and what I do.

Some Questions for you on effective coaching.

Do you need to have a conversation to work out what to do with the time that has been given to you?

If it’s useful for you, I’d be more than happy to have a conversation. Contact me here.

Triage coaching – Nathan Whitbread in conversation with Claire Pendrick

So what is triage coaching?

Here is the recording of a conversation about Triage Coaching that moved my thinking forward – along with some of the highlights below.

These are some of the things I took away

Quite often when we know something is wrong we don’t always know what we need to fix it. Triage coaching is a single session that allows the thinker to navigate what they need to answer their questions. Spoiler alert — coaching isn’t always the answer.

Triage coaching is a place:

  • where you can talk about your workplace in a confidential space.
  • where you can work out what you want to do.
  • that leaves you in control.
  • that gives you agency in terms of what you do and don’t disclose.
  • that allows you to get to the issue before you work out the best way to deal with it.
  • that allows the issue to be dealt with without any detail needing to be shared.
  • to move things forward.
  • place that keeps the power in the middle, and
  • that is safe place that organisations can offer to their people.

What it can help stop happening.

  • Time and money being invested in the wrong things!
  • Confidentiality being broken (subject to safeguarding)!
  • Individuals from saying something that didn’t need to be said in the workplace!
  • Escalating levels of helpfulness creating premature disclosure!

The justification.

  • It’s incredibly cost-effective!
  • It maintains agency!
  • It enables cocreated conversations that change everything!

What to know more?

Please get in contact. It was the most amazing privilege to join Claire Pendrick MMC for a conversation on her podcast the Coaching Inn. For those of you who do not know, she is the author of Simplifying Coaching, one of the most inspiring and interesting books on the subject.

Explosion

Exploded coaching, or coaching exploded?

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could take the same powerful insights that we get from individual coaching and implement them in a team environment?

Now imagine that environment also supporting each individual member to become a better coach themselves.

The group deals with real problems by working together with the intention of moving forward and getting things done.

This is not just another talking shop, it is a place where real problems get focused on, learning happens and new ways of solving problems are implemented.

There will be an opportunity to think outside the box, expand on ideas and solve problems in ways that you’ve never expected.

Thinking and assumptions will be challenged with the goal of moving things forward. Each team member will have the opportunity to bring their question and come away with a plan to move ahead.

Exploded coaching is built on the belief that reflecting on our experience and experimenting with what we can do differently will bring insight and action. In many ways, it’s about having a different kind of conversation in order to change everything!

Is this totally new?

Not entirely, it’s based on the concept of Action Learning Sets, but what’s different is the way it’s implemented in your organisation by bringing the opportunity to use existing meeting spaces in new and more productive ways…

I’m currently looking for two organisations to pilot this coaching approach. If you have a team that is stuck or needs to create space to think collaboratively together, then please get in contact as I believe this could offer you an opportunity to move forward. Get in touch here.

The unfair test - Neurodiversity and Intersectionality

Neurodiversity and intersectionality: lost opportunities and goldfish?

Situation

A considerable number of people are still arriving in adulthood without a diagnosis or understanding of their neurodivergent traits (ASC, DCD, dyslexia, dysgraphia or other neurodivergent traits). There is often an assumption that people know what they need and know how to access it. The reality is not everyone has access to the support and insight that is needed to help them identify their neurodivergent traits. This is why I think it’s so important to consider neurodiversity and intersectionality.

Neurodiversity is all of us. Some individuals are neurodivergent and have traits including strengths and difficulties that are unique to them. Intersectionality is a framework that considers the social and political identity of an individual. When the two are combined it creates the potential for extreme advantage or disadvantage for the individual.

Neurodiversity is a term originally coined by Judy Singer in her bachelor thesis and later explored by Harvey Bloom who Singer corresponded with. When the term was originally introduced it described the autistic community, but since then it has become synonymous with a far broader range of thinking styles. The neurodiversity umbrella has now opened further to include many acquired conditions and medical diagnoses like migraines and PTSD to mention a few.

Intersectionality is a framework for understanding how a person’s social and political identity combines to create discrimination and privilege. This term was first conceptualised by Kimberlé Williams Crenshaw. The original work was looking at gender and race, but again this term has broadened out to include a much wider spectrum that includes underrepresented groups.

When we look through the lens of intersectionality, neurodivergent individuals can experience huge opportunities while others experience a perfect storm of disadvantages.

For example, a male from a middle-class family with supportive parents is more likely to receive support and opportunities to amplify his strengths and manage his difficulties than a female who has grown up in a deprived area and has a mixed cultural heritage. There are many biases in play including gender, race, language, criminality, and social-economic background. This can put the female mentioned above at a considerable disadvantage before she has even started the race. When we then lay on top neurodivergent conditions for example ASD (Autism), where much of the criteria for diagnosis have been developed around male behaviour and presentation, the female is considerably less likely to be diagnosed and as a result, receive support that would amplify her strengths and help her manage her difficulties.

Task

The task before us is to ensure individuals have access to appropriate screening and diagnostic resources in order that they can be properly identified regardless of their social and economic background. In short we must consider their neurodiversity and intersectionality. This then needs to be followed up with appropriate support and guidance for individuals to understand their strengths and difficulties, allowing for the introduction of co-created interventions that help them be their most effective.

The government this week through Matt Hancock has proposed a blanket policy of screening every child of school age for dyslexia. Though at first, this seems like an excellent policy, what is important to consider is this is a screening of one neurodivergent set of traits. Based on research by Prof Amanda Kirby, co-occurrence of neurodivergent conditions is the norm rather than the exception. So, what will be missed? Is this just creating another silo with partial knowledge that doesn’t allow the individual to fully understand their neurodiversity?

Screening is just the start of the journey. Interventions and reasonable adjustments based on the whole person are essential to help individuals amplify their strengths and manage the things they find difficult.

Playing fields can seem level until you look at where the starting point is!

The challenge is not just to look at the individual as something to be fixed, but to also look to the organisational context that the individual is within. As with this illustration, a goldfish has many strengths, but climbing trees is not one of them, especially if the purpose of the assessment is to find out how well the candidates can swim!

Action on neurodiversity and intersectionality

As we look at how to be truly inclusive, organisations must look beyond the easy silos, considering people as a whole and making sure that we reach out to groups and individuals who have different intersectional backgrounds. We must look at this as a process of changing our organisations instead of fixing individuals to fit in.

As we embark on this process it is important that we engage in constructive dialogue and do not take shortcuts. Quick wins are okay but shortcuts are often detrimental to the overall aims of what we are trying to achieve. Look for evidence-based approaches like work-based strategy coaching that support individuals and teams to deal with their own issues so they can be their most effective at work.

These evidence-based approaches look at supporting the individual with the tools and strategies that are relevant for them to be most effective in the workplace. They also look beyond this and start to consider the organisation or environmental factors that impact the individual while critically reviewing their purpose and their fitness for use with the overall aim of creating workplaces that are better for everyone.

Many adjustments that are put in place to support neurodiversity are person-centric (changing the person, not the problem). Though important they do not address the environmental factors that cause disability. If there are no environmental changes then we run the danger of just putting a sticking plaster on the problem.

How to make neurodiversity and intersectionality work

We talked about insight, environment and impact. The reality is we are all looking for practical measures that can be used to make the neuroinclusive workplaces a reality.

So here are some suggestions on where to start:

  • Understand your colleagues, not just who you think they are, but who they really are. Take time to talk to them, listen to them, and get your head around where they are at.
  • Be compassionate and listen to hear what they’re saying, as opposed to listening to tell them what you think.
  • This is a marathon, not a sprint. Pace yourself for a sustained effort as change is often painful, but the results are extremely worthwhile.
  • Actively seek out and recognise where there is discrimination or practices for disadvantage individuals or groups of people.
  • Record and measure where there are inequalities and start the process of deciding how you are going to measure and record the changes you want to see.
  • Be honest and be ready to own up to the mistakes you have already made and will make in the future.
  • This process is as much about building relationships as changing things.
  • Do not make neurodiversity the ‘charity of the year,’ this is an ongoing effort that needs to be ingrained within your organisation’s culture.
  • Do not be tokenistic, keep it real or it will be worth nothing.
  • Start with people and finish with people (with no campaigns in the middle).

Results to expect from neurodiversity and intersectionality

This all starts with positive power and neutral conversations built on trust. These will open dialogue that enables a more inclusive workplace that considers the intersectionality of the individuals involved. Let’s do this openly, while actively looking to engage others from different backgrounds, cultures and experiences, especially those in the groups identified experiencing a greater level of difficulty and or representation within your organisation and society (looking outside your organisation is also helpful).

Review

What has been described here is a process that enables organisations to become more neuroinclusive especially to those with different intersectional backgrounds. As this is a process it has no endpoint, it is instead something that will constantly need to evolve and adapt based on the greatest resource organisations have – your people.

 

Original article published on FE News here.